Said ... I already had one Boyfriend take his life, now this one who Assumed I was his lover is going to take his, I don't need this shit, I'm done I'm done, I'm fucking DONE!!! Fuck, why does this always happen to me!!!!
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Said ... Thanks guys...it just hit me kinda all of a sudden that night. Things are much better now, and I've finally got him to understand that I was NEVER his Boyfriend...he's still delusional though, it's Sad.
Said ... Okay, I come from a very strong family of Shaman and Healers, why is it that now, I am dealing with those people who are more pure bloodline, and living on the Res, that they become so drawn to me for answers, things that I in their native tongue, cannot answer directly, but can tell them, from what I see and feel, and yet the truth is not what they want to believe?? Okay, Yes...It confuses me too!!! I don't speak Chinese, but if it were to the spirits, I would Understand it for some reason!!! UnlikeYou like thisLike
Said ... @Both of You...now he says, He is condemning himself to HELL! I hope he is not doing anything stupid right now...he has not text me back, I do feel...disconnection though, Please tell me it is not what I feel it is. Someone, anyone...I already had a Boyfriend take his own life before this...I don't need a friend taking himself away.
~Confused!! :(
Said ... Now he keeps talking about how and why I give a shit about him...and his own life....Damn, I hope he does not take his life!!! I've been open with him about everything, but he has drowned himself in his own self disillusions, He is in LUST with me, started saying he loved me after the 2nd day just chatting with him!!
Said ... Okay, so I am at this...and have to face it on my own...I see now.
I breath in the Pillar of smoke, becoming one with the heat of the flickering flames...and jumping now into the fire...If it burns me, it is done...If I feel no pain, I am the Flame...and I am then, the Cure.